Episode 30: Why You Can Be Tired and Still Have a Hard Time Resting

Have you ever been completely exhausted, finally sat down…and somehow still couldn't settle?

Your body is on the couch.

Your brain is reviewing tomorrow's schedule.

You're scrolling your phone.

You're remembering the email you forgot to send.

You turn on the TV, but you're also answering texts while watching it.

Twenty minutes later, you've technically been “resting.”

But you don't actually feel rested.

This is where I think a lot of us get confused:

Being tired and being ready to rest are not always the same thing.

You can be physically tired while your mind and body are still moving at the pace of the day you just had.

And baby, some of us have been GOING.

Work.

Kids.

Appointments.

Errands.

Decisions.

Workouts.

Dinner.

Laundry.

Being the person who somehow knows where everybody's stuff is.

Then at 8:00 we're supposed to magically switch all of that off because we sat down?

Sometimes your body needs a transition.

Rest Isn't the Same as Stopping

When most of us think about recovery, we think about doing less.

And yes, that's part of it.

But intentionally recovering is different from simply not moving.

Scrolling Instagram while lying down is technically low-activity.

That doesn't necessarily mean your attention is resting.

Watching TV while answering emails isn't exactly asking nothing from your brain.

Even lying in bed can turn into another performance if you're thinking:

I need to fall asleep now because if I don't, I'm only going to get six hours and fourteen minutes…

Girl. 😂

Your body may be still while the rest of you is very much at work.

That's one reason I love restorative yoga.

Restorative yoga gives you a clear transition from doing to being supported.

You're not there to burn calories.

You're not trying to increase flexibility.

You're not trying to make the pose look cute.

You're creating a position where your body can stop working so hard.

The Goal Isn't to Be Calm All the Time

Let me say this because nervous system conversations have gotten a little out of hand online.

You do not need to spend your whole life calm.

Stress is normal.

Activation is normal.

You need energy to exercise.

You need alertness to drive.

You need some activation when it's time to handle business.

Your nervous system having a stress response isn't automatically a problem.

The more useful question is:

Can you come back down when the stressful thing is over?

That's recovery.

And recovery is something we can practice.

Not because your body is broken.

Because your body is constantly responding to what you're asking from it.

The Rest & Recover Method

I wanted restorative yoga to feel doable for women who already have full lives.

You probably do not need another 47-step wellness routine.

So my Rest & Recover Method is simple:

3–5 poses.
3–5 minutes each.
3–5 props.

That's it.

You might practice for 10–15 minutes.

Maybe 20–25 when you have more time.

But you don't need an hour for rest to count.

Within the method, I teach three things:

Support

Your body shouldn't have to fight gravity to stay in a restorative pose.

Use the bolster.

Use pillows.

Use blankets.

Use the couch cushion.

Use sturdy books if you don't own yoga blocks.

Bring the support to your body instead of forcing your body into a shape.

Soften

Once you're supported, notice where you're still unnecessarily working.

Jaw tight?

Shoulders lifted?

Hands gripping?

Belly braced?

You do not need to bark “RELAX!” at yourself.

Just notice whether you can let a little effort go.

Five percent counts.

Stay

We spend most of our lives rushing from one thing to the next.

Restorative yoga asks you to stay somewhere for a few minutes.

Long enough to notice your breath.

Long enough to notice the support underneath you.

Long enough to stop immediately asking, What's next?

And yes, your brain may still be talking.

You didn't fail yoga.

You don't have to empty your mind to recover.

Stop Waiting Until You Crash

A lot of women don't intentionally recover.

We accidentally recover after we've run out of energy.

We push.

Push.

Push.

Push.

Then collapse.

And because we stopped moving, we call that rest.

I'd rather you begin practicing recovery before your body has to force the issue.

That might mean five minutes with your legs on the couch after a workout.

Ten minutes of restorative yoga between work and dinner.

A supported child's pose before bed.

A walk where you're not tracking the pace.

A few minutes lying on the floor with a pillow under your knees.

It doesn't have to be dramatic to matter.

And you don't have to earn it by exhausting yourself first.

Rest Supports the Life You Want to Keep Living

I'm not teaching women to replace exercise with lying down.

I want you strong.

I want you walking.

I want you lifting weights if you're able.

I want you moving in ways that support the life you want to live.

And recovery helps make that movement sustainable.

Because the goal isn't to win one hard workout.

The goal is to keep doing the things that make you feel strong for years.

If you keep telling yourself, I need to rest more, make it specific.

Give yourself ten minutes today.

Three supported positions.

A few minutes in each.

No phone.

No accomplishment.

No gold star.

Just support.

Your body has been doing a lot.

Give her somewhere to put herself down.

Want to hear the full conversation? Listen to this week's episode: Why You Can Be Tired and Still Have a Hard Time Resting.

And if you want a weekly place to practice this with me, you can join us inside Rest Club for restorative yoga, breathwork, and intentional recovery.